Frustrations & Raindrops

Frustrations and raindrops didn’t pour on your birthday
In fact,
it is a nice day
full blast and sunburnt

Frustrations and raindrops didn’t pour on your birthday
Trust me,
Clouds just rolled by calmly
in an ocean of blue, the lightest kind

Frustrations and raindrops didn’t pour on your birthday

Come see it,
It was warm
it hugs you and cuddles you joyously

Frustrations and raindrops didn’t pour on your birthday

Feel it,
a very calm breeze
freedom and bliss

Frustrations and raindrops didn’t pour on your birthday

I just forgot it
It is such a nice day indeed

I just skipped, twirled and  laughed the whole day




It was the pavements we used to walk on;
the single freaking reason why we try to bury ourselves into piles upon piles and hundreds, among thousands, of reasons why we need to go on. We always try to punch ourselves in the gut just to feel the pain for us not to look back and walk back. We always try to find excuses to be somebody else. In the end, it does not even matter if we like ourselves or not because perception, and judgment, is not in our hands. It is in the hands of someone else.

A/N: The original unedited version of the piece above appeared on my personal instagram on
April 2015

Fading Destiny

I often say

I want to see you face to face

Touch the tip of your finger once

Breathe the air that you take in

Because we knew it

Since the start,

We have that “spark”

We were soulmates

We are meant to meet

And see each other face to face


But then,

Destinies does not mean you are required to

It does not mean we have to

The tips of our fingers are not enough basis

And the sparks that we feel won’t make things light up

We are not miracles

I am not your miracle


But of course I am glad to have met you

Meeting you is like completing a reaction

Living a life that was once out of life, resurrected

But buffering it out is just fine
Thank you for walking in

Fluttering Gone

You are just always sitting there,
Sitting on the floor
Leaning against the wall
Staring at an almost empty dance floor

My first love always looked like that;

My first love always smells like sweat;
From running around
Falling off
But smiling again

My first love always gets to be reminded;
Of how annoying the days were
Of how naggy I can get
Of how immature I was

The suns were always shining with first love
Perspire & you will always smell life they say
Run and you will lose
But we intend to always run away anyway

I don’ t even know if we have started
We just always tend to get ended
Cruel & always drifting apart,

This is my first love




Today, I have been around this earth for 2 1/2 decades.

It has been a long and grueling journey. In fact, when I was 22, I almost believed that I am doomed for life but here I am today; teaching, thinking about all the things that I have to do tomorrow.

All these years, I do not know how I survived all my life,. It seems like I have been running most times. But late last year I have come to realize that I need to stop running and face all the things that I am running away from. I think that thing that just happened to me is what most people call “Growing Up”.

I have came to a point that I do not have any options but to face and love me for who I am which includes all the mistakes and all the regrets. It was a though one to conquer but at the end of the day, those things are really part of you. You already have committed them and those things have made you to be the great person you are today. And they are all you. You are them.

When you are 25, at one point you have to stop and ponder all the things that have happened to you for the past years. And looking back, I have come to realize how looooooooongggg it took to be just merely here, Alive, Surviving.

So I am thankful to all the people that made those 25 years worth 25 years. All the experiences and things that they have imparted to me. All the tears, the laughter, the hellos, the goodbyes, all of it. I am just so glad to have met all of them. If I have to live this life all over again, well let’s be honest, I would edit some out but all in all, this life is a good one so far.

I think being half of fifty is embracing who you truly are, with out all the masks and pretensions you have managed to wear and project all your life. It is embracing your true self and being happy with it.

It’s a year of being happy and proud of who you manage to become despite all the scars that have managed to decorate your skin. It does not even matter if they look pretty or not. At least you have a proof of bravery and your life so far is a witness of courage and undying hope for living.

At one-fourth of a century, honesty is the most important virtue that you can be proud of out there in a world full of temporary and easy-to-dispose things. Honesty will take you places and it will bring a solid integrity to your whole existence. It turns out, Honesty is the new sexy these days and not all people tell the truth always.

I actually like how things have turned out with all the things in it. At least now I know better. I know more stuff now. Life survival skills; cooking without burning anything, general household chores. Creative stuff; blogging, layouting, design, watercolor, painting. And the latest of them all, Teaching stuff; discussing things in front of a class, making exams and quizzes.

See, I know stuff now. I am definitely proud of it!

But if you ask me if I imagine myself reaching full fifty… Hmmmm… Right now, it is beyond me. I do not know and I do not have any clue if I can last that long.

For now,
I am just so proud that I have reached a quarter of a whole century, half of what the life expectancy was in the 60s and being 25.

It was a though course of life but look!

I am here, ALIVE.

Here’s to me and to all the people who are turning 25 this year~!

To a good life~!